I think I've mentioned before that my husband is sweet, kind, and giving, in his own way. He isn't overtly romantic, but he does surprise me at times (like last year he got me a telescope for my birthday, and for our anniversary he got me one of those cool bike trailer thingys so my girl could ride behind me). Today I received 2 dozen red roses at work. And he ordered a cute little bear and Hershey Kisses for my girl. And here's what really got me: He ordered flowers for 'all the girls in (his) life'-his mom, grandmother, my mom, my sister, me, and my girl. How sweet is he? That just warms my heart, even if he is an ass sometimes. (LOL)
But, years ago, before my girl was around, we would do the same thing right around Valentine's Day: We would go do our taxes. I know, I know-so romantic. But while we waited our turn, we would go eat at Taco Cabana (because it happened to be in the same parking lot as the tax place). We would beat the rush and the mayhem at other restaurants. Again, I know-so romantic.
It was just me and him. I loved that. It was simple, but it was 'us'.
Now, we have a CPA do our taxes, since my husband owns his own business. We don't go to any special place. My husband views this holiday as a gimmick. He doesn't want to wait 4 hours for a table at a restaurant. He doesn't view this as romantic, or time well-spent. I can't ever find a card that quite conveys how I feel about him; I end up picking up some silly card, in the hopes that it will crack a smile. Now, we have my girl. We don't have date nights; we don't have romantic evenings. He is too busy at work. But he did take the time to order all those flowers, and get my girl something special.
There are times when I wish for the simpler days. No juggling of multiple activities: cooking dinner, playing Barbies with my girl, reading for class, catching some sleep, trying to watch a few of my favorite shows, trying to catch some downtime with my husband when he's not working. Things get so complicated; time is so precious. It goes by so fast. I like that right now, my girl is just excited to give Valentines to her preschool friends. I don't want her teenage years to hit me in the face just yet, when she is aching for a valentine from 'that one guy' (or girl, I suppose). I want time to slow down a bit, so I can enjoy her smile as she opens all these little Scooby Doo & Sponge Bob cards from her friends. I want time to slow down so I can sit with my husband, both of us awake, alert, and attending to each other, and smelling these beautiful roses he ordered for me.
I know there are lots of men out there that would have a whole evening planned (or maybe a whole weekend since Monday is a holiday?)-roses, rose pedals, romantic candlelight dinner, hotel room, presents, jewelry (And of course sex, right? Because that is the one and only thinga man really expects on Valentine's Day, right??)? I don't want that. More than anything, I want to know that my husband loves me by his actions and his words, not by the things he buys.
He has worked extremely long hours the past 2 weeks, which is not really out of the ordinary, now that I think of it. Several nights, he didn't get home until 1 or 2am. He's had such little sleep that he woke up with a serious cold this week, which is about par for him. But, he remembered to order flowers for all of the women in his life, among deadlines, drawings, floor plans, phone calls, and projects.
Although we don't have the same Valentine's Day tradition, I am okay with that.