2. My brother and I have passed down to my sister the awesome past-time of throwing bouncy balls in the kitchen, at approximately 45mph, at the same time as #1 above.
3. Contrary to popular belief, my brother does not like getting hit in the eye once (or TWICE, actually) by a bouncy ball travelling approximately 45mph.
4. My dogs like bouncy balls.
5. My boxer likes them so much that he ate one tonight.
6. Now I know why we were short a bouncy ball before #2 above, and also why he was trying to eat my fern yesterday.
7. You can indeed google "Can a dog poop a bouncy ball?".
8. You won't necessarily find the answers calming or helpful.
9. You can get 6 loud individuals to shut up if you feed them pasta, bread, and salad.
10. Except for the little one, who decided she wanted pb&j.
11. Paramour's lead Haley sounds like a pirate in the song Only Exception. ("You...AAARG!...the only exception")
12. You can't understand Taylor Swift's lyrics even if said people are stuffing their faces in silence.
13. There's a lot of gas in this house.
14. In fact, sometimes you have to sniff the abandoned shoes and socks by the couch to be sure it isn't stinky feet smell.
15. It's the dogs. I swear.
16. You can indeed drop a beta fish down the kitchen drain (by mistake) and save him.
17. You can do this without the 5 year old knowing.
18. He seems to be okay, although he's not swimming around much.
19. Cleaning his bowl is a bitch, apparently.
20. My brother's coveralls for work have the word WENIS on them.
21. This word makes us giggle like 12 year old boys.
22. My brother looks like an astonaut in his coveralls. And he's a greenhorn in the company, so he gets to wear a green hardhat and green gloves.
23. It's a bad picture, but it makes us giggle anyway.
24. He doesn't have a good sense of humor at all times.
25. As a result, we learned that a kid's softball bat will indeed leave welts.
26. Certain unnamed individuals in this house leave gallon containers in the fridge when they have approximately 2.1 cm of liquid in them.
27. Other certain unnamed individuals THROW things into the pantry, so when other unnamed individuals (read: ME) open the door, shit falls out on my head and feet.
28. Other certain unnamed individuals leave glasses all over the house with approximately 2.1 cm of liquid in them.
29. 2.1 cm of liquid looks like a lot when a bouncy ball knocks over a glass going approximately 45mph.
30. A fiesty fly and a dumbass june bug (HELLO?! It is SEPTEMBER) can really keep dogs and people entertained (Video to follow)
So what can I learn at your house in a very small amount of time?