Well, I haven't blogged since Day 2 of my cleanse, and there is a good reason for that. Namely...well, I fell off the cleansing bandwagon the night of Day 2. NO, really. The stuff didn't taste bad, but I had a 2 hour period where I couldn't drink it, and that was just enough time for my stomach to come alive and, well, inhale my liver. And my spleen. And really, once my stomach starts ingesting my other organs, it's all over. So.
It's all over.
I ate dinner that night, and I also happened to have a package of Rolo's. Mmmmmm.
And see, Ash Wednesday was, well, WEDNESDAY, and I decided that this Lent, I was going to give up all of the yummy things my belly loves to eat. And I love healthy stuff too, so I am committed to eating healthy, eating very little fried crap, cutting down on calories, and.....
No ice cream.
No cake.
No cookies.
No candy.
No starbucks' pastries.
No cupcakes.
My stomach is pretty pissed about this decision. But I am sure my ass will thank me later, when I walk around in a bathing suit for 7 days in Mexico.
And exercise is right around the corner. NO, really.
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The other reason I stopped the damn cleanse was simple: I was so damn worn out from my 2 year old's damn fever, and I just wanted to be able to comfort myself with something yummy and full of fat-ass calories.
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So, the fever finally left the house Wednesday afternoon. Yippeeeee. I kicked it's ass out the front door. Seriously. And then she came home from school today (the kid, not the fever), and she was a whiny, crying, clinging, pale kiddo again. Are you KIDDING ME????? I can't do this another weekend, seriously. I will literally lock myself in my closet and let my stomach eat all my other organs. (Can I say 'Seriously' a few more times in this post?)
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Can I boycot all things Valentine's Day? The flowers, the 'Every kiss begins with Kay' commercials, the heart-shaped boxes of chocolates, the cute Victoria Secret perfume gifts, the sexy red & pink lingerie with the little hearts & lots of lace, the gag-me-with-a-heart-shaped-lollipop lovie-dovie cards???? I am so over the holiday. No, I'm not bitter. And yes, I love flowers, and candy, and real, spontaneous, heartfelt sentiment. It just isn't like it was when I was younger. And yes, my husband is sweet. It's just not the same. I have spent way too much time and energy trying to feel that excitement, anticipation, and sweetness that comes along with this holiday and your crush.
I say blah. Blah. Blah.
I think I need something sweet to make me sweet again. Which sort of defeats the purpose of this ranting I call a blog, huh?
Oh, well.
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