Friday Filler (Also: I'm fighting those mosquitoes & I.WILL.WIN)

So, let's see..how can I bore you for the next minute & a half?

Well, first off, my final grades are still not posted for this semester. It's killing me, the not knowing. I'm pretty sure I will check the stupid website 487,129 times between now and, say, Saturday.

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So after my girl got unbelievably swollen & beat-up looking from two mosquito bites, I spent a good deal of time on Google. (And I realize those pictures might not look all that bad to you, but both of those were taken within 20 minutes of being bitten, and she got worse, much worse. We are talking eye swollen shut, black & blue all the way around her eye, for days. We are talking entire foot swollen & purple, and then bruised for 3 or 4 days after the fact.)
After talking to her doctor again, we agree she is medically allergic to mosquito bites. I want to avoid pumping Zyrtec into her body every day of her life. I want to avoid spraying DEET on her every day. I do not want to have to avoid being outside, going to the park, playing ball, playing in the sandbox. It's just not fair to her. We are lucky enough that she hasn't been bitten on her neck, by her mouth, on her lip. Can you imagine if her throat closed up? I don't even want to think about it.
Anyway, I want to fight back. I want to try some natural things, in addition to the f-ing chemical warfare I've already scheduled to occur next week. So I spent 14568 hours on Google, looking at alternatives. Suggestions include planting peppermint, marigolds, rosemary, catnip, eucalyptus, & citronella grass in your yard. There's also something called a mosquito plant that you can supposedly only buy online, that I might try as well. I already have some peppermint & rosemary in my backyard, but I'm going to make sure I buy all of them, and put them in planters/pots by all my doors, so the little fuckers think twice before trying to enter my house.

Also, there's this eucalyptus lotion that supposedly pisses them off. I'm buying it. I've heard sandalwood lotion helps piss them off too; seeking it out as we speak.

So, dear Internet, I tell you all this to ask: do you have any tried & true things that repel the blood-sucking fuckers? Also, how about things you use to stop the pain, itch, and intense swelling? Oh wait, not everyone has that reaction. So far, we've been giving her Zyrtec, motrin for the swelling & pain, and putting lots of ice packs on. I've also made a paste out of baking soda & water to cover the bites with, but she isn't so happy about this one.

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Do you know what I cannot stand? When the help* does the laundry & "accidentally" puts two pair of dark jean shorts in with the light-colored clothing because then all the light-colored clothing comes out looking dirtier than it did when it went in, since now it all has this light-blue tint to it. I mean, I really enjoy my workout bra smelling fresh, but I really don't like it looking f-ing dingy. Ditto for my husband's socks & my cute white tank.

Do you know what else I can't stand? When "someone" forgets to leave a towel by the shower, so when I get out of my nice warm shower, I end up having to freeze my butt off walking to the linen cabinet to get a towel, and then on my way back over to the shower, I slip on the water footprints I made, and catch myself on the wall, but only after my foot goes in the trashcan & a toothpick gets stuck between my toes.

Yeah, good times.

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Has anyone seen Damon Wayans Junior? He was on Jimmy Fallon last night, and wow is he a cutie! He does look like his dad, and omg, all the Wayans sound alike & have similar facial expressions, but where have they been hiding this sweet guy?** And now I'm thinking of them in White Chicks & cracking my ass up.

*By "the help", I mean me.
**And that reminds me, The Bloggess asked recently who we would have sex with that isn't exactly a hottie. I said Rob Schneider & Steve Carell, but HELLO?? How could I forget the Wayans? Go check out the responses, as long as you aren't faint of heart!