If you had any idea how difficult it is for me to listen to some songs....
The love we had was brief. But real.
So perfect that words don't do it justice.
But we were young and so fucked up, in our own ways... it just didn't work.
He was jealous because I liked the attention from other boys.
I was selfish.
I let him go.
It was the worst thing I could have done at that time.
This is just one of the songs written on his arms, under his shirt-sleeves, for me.
And then, if that weren't enough, these words, down his left arm, where the final words were smudged from my tears, right at his wrist:
I know it seems a bit juvenile, melodramatic, silly & TV-drama stupid. I haven't written the story here yet. I haven't shared with many others, the mess of pain mixed with intense love with a fucked up 14 year old who stole my heart when I was 17.
There are scabs that have healed into pale scars here, there, but sometimes-- something picks at them and brings it all just below the surface again.
There are songs I wish I would never hear again. These are two of them.