Text messages between Jill & I earlier today, when she was leaving her office to grab some lunch:

Jill: i hate skinny bitches

Me: LOL! me 2! trip her!

Jill: eh..we were in the elevator so she was standing still. but i did shoot daggers into the back of her head.

Me: You should have cornered her and force-fed her pastries covered in lard!

Jill: Ha! instead i just got myself a pastry with a side of lard. that'll teach her!

Me: HA! Take that, beYOTCH!!


Jill and I spend our work days instant-messaging and texting one another. I do get a lot of work done, although my boss doesn't always think so. It is just so nice to have someone right there that I can send my thoughts to. We talk about food a lot, our girls, the past, our problems. We rant and rave, and totally support one another. And she gets me. We complete each other's thoughts sometimes.

I have known Jill since 5th grade. A couple of years ago we found out that we were both invited to the birthday party of our mutual friend Steff, back in 3rd grade. I don't remember being there, and I certainly don't remember anyone else. Which, is amazing in of itself, because I remember everything (Not like the person who actually remembers every bit of life since she was born-that would be MADDENING). So, I say I've known her since 5th grade, but it could actually be longer; who knows.

Jill & I had homeroom together, with Mrs. Brown. We also had history together (with the f-ing teacher who was like 90 and all.he.did.was.teach.us.about.the.native.american.indians), math, lunch, and English. So, we were pretty inseparable at school. Thing 1 and 2. BFF's. Whatever you want to call it. All through middle school, through 9th grade, we were lucky enough to have several classes together (and some might venture to say that the teachers were UNlucky).

We were crazy together. Sleepovers (sometimes in a tent in my backyard-my neighbors LOVED that), birthday parties, school dances, field trips. All these things included one common denominator-us falling apart in fits of giggles. In the summers, we spent hours out of each day in my pool, swimming, screaming, imagining, laughing, splashing. We'd stop long enough to eat.

We used to eat A LOT when we slept over at her house. And I remember a couple of times we snuck a couple of beers from her father, in 8th grade. I think we just wanted to see what the fuss was all about, but I don't remember getting drunk. We would play Where in the World is Carmen Santiago? on her computer. And this interesting astrological/fortune game. And we would stay.up.all.night.long.

I stuck one of these to her forehead once, in class. It left a BRUISE, not just a red mark. We started a food fight in the lunchroom in 8th grade. We flung mashed potatoes onto the ceiling. We flicked paper across any classroom.

We would bounce several bouncy balls all over my kitchen. Apparently that was hilarious. We also threw a Koosh ball back and forth in the dark, lying in the guest room of my parents' house. It would hit the wall, the ceiling, the fan, the blinds. Again, apparently it was hilarious.

In middle school, neither of us played sports very well. We never made the teams, so we were always in 'off-season'. Which meant we got put with the other un-cool people, and we spent a lot of each gym period in the 'weight room'. Which led to muscles, yes, but also let to a good relationship with several of the boys' coaches (not inappropriate, although everyone thought Coach Styron was hot). Which led to us being the coaches' assistants in 8th grade for one period each day. Which led to us being put in the boys' locker room, to 'organize' the football helmets, flinging sweaty jockstraps at each other, and throwing around footballs & basketballs. I don't recall us getting a lot of laundry or work done. But it was fun!

We were also in band together in middle school. We both played the clarinet. We got in trouble a lot, for talking, flinging stuff across the band hall, giggling, and acting up in the practice rooms.

Once we hit 10th grade, she was on the drill team for our school, and I was a band geek (go right ahead and laugh!). So we didn't have any classes together, and we were on opposite ends of the school, it seemed. I'm not sure why we didn't talk all that much in 10th grade, but near the end of 11th grade, we realized we had a mutual friend, a guy who was poetic, funny, talented, and a great listener. So, he is how we got back in touch.

And then we graduated, and somehow lost touch again, until she found me on ICQ. She was in Japan. I was in Cedar Hill, finishing college, and planning a wedding. We reconnected instantly, and she helped me plan my wedding from across the Pacific Ocean.

She came back to Texas, was in my wedding, and then we lost touch again. What the hell??
Then we got back in touch for her wedding, but I couldn't actually go to her wedding, because it was in Florida, and I just didn't have the money at the time. Also, I had started my first big job since my degree, which required my being in court A LOT, and the day before her wedding, there was this huge case I was expected to testify in (which I did, and it sucked, but there was a good outcome). I was so sad to miss her wedding, and still feel bad about it to this day (Sorry Jill). Again, we lost touch.

She went through her first pregnancy and birth, of her gorgeous daughter Lorelei. Where was I? No idea! I have no idea how or why we lost touch each time; shit happens, right? I know we aren't the only people to do that, right? (RIGHT?????) Somehow we re-connected when I was pregnant with my girl. And this time, we have stayed connected. I got to see her pregnant with her second daughter, and actually got to see her in the hospital after giving birth. We give each other our Christmas presents in April (or May or June) because we are 'very busy women', but we IM every day.

Our girls love each other. My girl asks about Lorelei alllllll the time, and loves to call Ellison 'Baby Elllllllison'.

Several months ago, they were at my house. The hubbies were playing Playstation, Jill & I were drinking some wine and going nuts trying to finish one conversation among all the chatter of our girls. My husband jokingly said, 'I wonder when their first sleep over is going to happen? And can it happen at your house?'

I giggle just to think about what that will be like, because:

Our girls are silly together. They laugh and scream outrageously at each other. They destroy my girl's room, taking out each and every toy. One time, they turned her little tent upside down, and were lying on the roof of it, curled up together, all arms and legs and grins. They run up and down the hall, chasing one another, saying silly things. They go to the potty together, and jack with the toilet paper. I have a feeling they are going to be just like Jill & I were.

Jill was my guest-blogger/post-er person while I was gone. No, she doesn't have a blog, for those of you who asked (but WHY THE HELL NOT???). She's smart, funny, kind, and loyal. She's a great listener. She's so supportive. She also happens to be a good writer too, although she tries to tell me I am the writer, not her. (I will be having her as a guest blogger/post-er person again, she just doesn't know it yet! (Well, now you do!))
And for those of you who were wondering about an intervention to get her away from her kids FOR HER SANITY (yes, Jill, for your SANITY!): I try!, I really do! But it's hard to juggle our hubbies' schedules, our kids, our guilt. But we do get together occasionally, to eat (imagine that??) & catch up. She's a great friend, and I'm happy to say that I have known her for 18 years and counting!!!


Misty said...

WHATEVER. We all know you think your boss is hot..... (wink)

Glad you have such a great friend.... these days, it's lucky to have EVEN one.

Heather said...

I have a friend I've known for 18-19 years, and I wish I could get rid of her sometimes. I know that's terrible, but she drives me crazy. I have refrained mostly from mentioning her on my blog because I wish I didn't feel the way I do. She's one of those people who never has money, things never get fixed, she never stops bitching about her husband, asks for advice on how to fix all her problems and when you honestly tell her the reason she never has money is because she blows it all on eating out, she doesn't believe it or even listen. I keep her in my life because I love her children and don't want them to suffer if I were to just walk away after all this time. But I feel like I am getting less tolerant every day. =( Sorry to vent.

Anonymous said...

misty: yeah, yeah, i slept with my boss. but look at the gorgeous girl I got out of it? ;0)

heather: i totally understand. it's hard to let go of an old friendship, but even harder when it is a shitty one. Just love her how you can (even if it means only loving her kids). And you can vent to me anytime!

Anonymous said...


Sounds like a fun friend

Friglet said...

She sounds like an awesome friend. It's great to have friends that you share so much history with. :)