Sweeping it under the rug

A couple of weeks ago I made slight mention of the fact that I am apparently a shitty housekeeper. Let me rephrase that: I do not think that I am a shitty housekeeper. In a nutshell:
-My house is about 2800 square feet
-I have a 3 year old with a buttload of toys
-I have 2 large dogs who think they are little chiuahuas, so they lie on the couch. Said dogs also shed like they are f-ing chows.
-I am in a neighborhood that is not yet built out, so there is dust everywhere. EVERYWHERE.

I will readily admit that I sometimes avoid doing dishes, because the dishwasher is full of clean dishes, and I.just.don't.wanna. That was the first chore that was given to me as a kid, so I've literally been emptying the dishwasher for like 25 years.

I will also readily admit that I don't always do very well with the laundry. It's just not ever done. I mean, I start it on Thursday nights, I fold, I hang up, I do another load, etc. But I don't always put it away. I just sorta lose steam. So, there is often a load of dirty laundry on the laundry room floor, a clean load getting wrinkly in the dryer, and folded stuff on top of the dryer. But it's not like I'm feeding anyone or entertaining anyone in my damn laundry room.

Other than that, I vaccuum, I clean toilets, I dust, I empty trashcans, I sweep, mop, pull weeds, mow...you name it, I do it.

So, I was a bit, put out, shall we say, when my husband started shopping for a maid right before we went on vacation. Whaaaa...????

For many of my friends, my mom, and I'm sure all 4 of you, this getting-a-maid bullshit is just fucking fa-la-la music in your ears. But, not me. It would just be too simple, right? I am so very complicated, so why wouldn't I complicate this minor issue?

To be frank, it pretty much pisses me off. I mean, I bust my ass to do all the cleaning, take care of my girl, drop off drycleaning, pick up drycleaning, do grocery shopping, run random errands, take care of the dogs....and I work, and I'm emotionally supportive, and I try to find time to reach my own dreams......and the appreciation I get is 'Hey, can you go let the maid in to clean the house today?'

I am trying very hard here to be patient, kind, emotionally supportive and stable, but THIS.PISSES.ME.OFF.

I feel like he doesn't think I do good enough. And yes, people, I do seem to have this slight issue with thinking that no one thinks I'm good enough for things. And maybe I do lay a lot of this on my husband's shoulders, and yes, I realize that he is not saying I am a sucky wife by doing this, but, but....still.

So, the maid comes once a week, and we pay her money that I don't want to pay her, and I let her in, and I ooo & ahhh about the good job she does, and....I still clean all week. I mean, I don't dust the baseboards every week, and it's impossible to keep up with the damn dust, and I don't go for the cobwebs all the time, but I do all the other shit. Oh, and I don't clean my toilets now. Or my shower. Or my girl's bathtub.

But I'm still doing the shit I tend to get lazy with : the dishes and the laundry. Hmmf.

So tell me: Am I being irrational here? Too sensitive?


Kristie said...

Honey, if he's going to pay for it, take the deal. If you really hate, please send them maid to my house because I'm sick and tired of cleaning for 3 people and 4 animals.

Heather said...

I would be weird about the maid too. I'd be afraid she was looking through my drawers or playing with my sex toys or something. I have seen "caught on tape" videos of maids stealing. I had a friend in high school who's parents had a maid, and she said they would use toilet water to mop the floors as a short cut. And seriously, the privacy issue would just be too much for me to handle. I don't get it all done either, it's so never-ending you know, always a dirty dish or a load of laundry to do (didn't I just wash these???) but there are really more important things to do than spend all my time cleaning. This was one of my favorite poems when my daughter was little and I still think about it now:

Cleaning and scrubbing can wait for tomorrow,
For babies grow up, I've learned, to my sorrow.
So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust, go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep.

Maybe she's not a baby but I'd rather watch a movie or play a game with her than put away the clean dishes any day of the week.

I'm sure your husband is just trying to give you a break. Enjoy it and spent that time with your girl.

Anonymous said...

Do you clean for your maid? I would...I'd be too scared she'd think we are pigs (which we are) and think awful thoughts while she scrubs hubby's mis-fires off the toilet (which he does) or the fridge I like to grow green things in (they are there).

Hey....maybe if you start letting your girl poop on the baseboards the maid will quit? You can just shrug your shoulders and shake your head at hubby..."I dunno...she just started crying and ran out the front door. Weird."

THE Stephanie said...

Well you ARE a woman after my own heart - to some extent! I can never keep up with the laundry and I hate doing the dishes. BUT, maybe your hubby is just trying to give you a break. Maybe he sees how hard you're working and thinks that this will give you some relief.

Of course, I don't know you or your hubby :) BUT, either way, I hope it works out and I enjoyed reading your blog! Thanks for stopping by mine!!

Heidi said...

I felt the same way when my husband suggested a maid. We haven't broken down to get one yet, partially because I'm too stubborn to have things done "my way", but as I sit here there are dishes to be done and two loads of laundry waiting to make it from the living room to the bedrooms.... :)

Danielle said...

We have a maid and I.LOVE.HER!

I don't care about it. I insist on it.

But, because we have a maid, I don't clean the floors, bathrooms, toilets, carpets, anything. I let her do it once a week (but I don't have dogs either which would be different) and that's as good as it gets.

So, the other two biggies, my husband and I split. He does ALL the dishes period. I do ALL the laundry period.

So we all generally pick up after ourselves, and then I have laundry.

It works for us. But I don't care about him thinking I'm not a good cleaner. Cause I'm not. And then I get to blog instead...


Jenny Grace said...

Emptying the dishwasher is my absolute least favorite chore, simply because it was the first one I got when I was a kid. I avoid it like the plague.

Anonymous said...

I'd love to have a cleaning lady..everyone that I know that has one cleans before the cleaning lady gets there..I don't get that.